- The seats, when you will discover one, are rigidly uncomfortable
- Timetable is a piece of misplaced optimism. Immediate-travel tickets are a rip-off
- Railway stations as soon as had porters that will help you together with your baggage
The seats, when you will discover one, are rigidly uncomfortable and infrequently have a glob of chewing-gum caught to them.
The timetable is a piece of misplaced optimism. The moment-travel tickets are a rip-off. The on-board bathrooms pong and also you uncover the basin has no operating water solely after you've squirted that noxious cleaning soap in your palms.
And if that weren't sufficient to ship you around the bend, there's the peculiar English they use.
The seats, when you will discover one, are rigidly uncomfortable and infrequently have a glob of chewing-gum caught to them (File photograph)
'Our subsequent station cease is Swindon' croaks the Tannoy.
Station cease? Why not simply say 'cease', as any sane individual would?
Then: 'We're arriving into Swindon.' Since when has 'into' been the preposition used after 'arrive'? Anybody with even a primary command of English is aware of you arrive 'at' a spot.
Welcome to Britain's infuriating, managerialised, sub-standard railways.
Bing-bong. Cue one other automated expression of remorse for 'delays to your journey right this moment'. Has it not dawned on the likes of Nice Western and Branson's Virgin pre-recorded apology won't ever sound honest?
Welcome to Britain's infuriating, managerialised, sub-standard railways
Railway stations as soon as had porters that will help you together with your baggage. Now we've got 'customer support groups' who barely raise a finger whereas aged folks battle with trapped wheelie-suitcases at digital obstacles.
Trains as soon as had guards with sensible peaked caps and red-striped trousers. Now we've got 'practice managers' in shiny fits who welcome you with the warning that if you're travelling on the improper form of ticket you may be whacked with a full-fat fare.
As a lad I cherished the restaurant automobiles. On the outdated Paddington to Kemble Junction specific they'd come to your desk and serve you teacakes and tea in a pot with a correct cup and saucer.
Now you're fortunate if there's a poky buffet bar providing U.S.-style cupcakes, espresso in a cardboard beaker and, 'a choice of alcoholic drinks'. Drinks! It's sufficient to drive you to gin earlier than breakfast.
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